hmm..jialat..my body clock is gg haywire..past 1 weeks gt few days i cant slp until afternoon 3+pm..i cant believe it man!!..i gt scolded by alot of ppl..& i noe i muz change my lifestyle..my slping times..& blah..but!!!..d prob is nt i dun wan..even sometime i set alarm clock 2 wake up early..oso no use..coz i sure end up gg back 2 slp..den until 4+ 5+pm den wake up..tis slpin pattern will last 4 few days..den sure gt 1 day i end up cant slp @all..& most likely my frens will receive a morning fwd sms by mi!!..sometimes, i can fall asleep after sending those fwd sms..but sometimes i cant..den end up, i dint slp @all..& in d afternoon 3+ den i go slp..by d time i woke up, its 6+ 7+pm..whenever i woke up, my 1st reaction is..haiz..tonite muz wait till 6+ 7+am den can slp liao..~~~..i oso dunnoe how lah..been trying real hard 2 change..or mayb there's no valid reason/excuse 4 mi 2 change..haiz..
i had tried slpin early like 4+ 5+..but everytime i cant slp until 6+am..when i'm on bed, den my mind starts 2 tink of things..happy, sad, worries..everythings juz come in..if everytime is happy den i'm fine w. it..but..haiz..sad things always auto flash back itself..& its seem 2 b uncontrollable..& most of d times r d days i'm w. him..whenever tt flashes back, i'll start 2 tink how stupid how naive i m 2 believe in things he had said 2 mi..seriously tt's v. stupid of mi!!!..& end up i'll feel so angry w. myself..haiz..
but i noe v. clearly..i tink of him is nt bcoz i still gt feelings 4 him or i still 1 him back..is simply bcoz i find myself so stupid..&everytime i tink of tis thing, tis conclusion nv fails 2 strike mi..he dint love me @all..or mayb nt even like..he jus 1 some1 2 cares 4 him..& @tt pt, i showed too much care&concern 4 him..tt's y he wanna b wif mi..& of coz there's some other things tt few frens told mi abt him..tt makes mi feel even more stupid..& i guess i noe y i dint wanna take pic/tok 2 him on grad day.. nt bcoz i hate him, nt bcoz i feel weird facin him..but i tink is bcoz d sight of him reminds mi of my stupidity..argh!!!!!!..
Anyway gonna stops here..gg slp..
*..is there ani way 2 stop myself frm thinkin how stupid i m??..haiz..i guess there's no way..but still thx him..i learnt few things bcoz of him..learnt nt 2 b so stupid again..etc..hmm..i beta get a job..so everything will back 2 normal..i find myself getting more&more unreasonable, bad temper..anyways juz find everything every mood got screwed up..k lah..end here..byez..*
so sian..sian till i finding nice interested real life stories or quotes..tis is 1 of it i came across..i tink more of such quotes or stories or tinking questions will b posted..hehe
i found tis chinese webby http://home.kimo.com.tw/cpo168/soho/stpost.html den came across tis posting by some ppl...
儘管自己多愛一個人， 也不能阻礙他自由飛翔的權利。 有個故事是這樣的～～
以前有一個凡間的女孩和一位天使相愛， 儘管天使每天都飛來飛去， 也會抽出很多的時間來陪她。 有一天，天使對女孩說： 「如果有一天，妳不再愛我了， 我會離開妳。 因為有愛我才能繼續地活下去， 當妳不愛我時， 我會到另一個女孩身邊。」 女孩告訴天使：「我永遠愛你」 一開始他們的日子過得很幸福， 但日子久了， 女孩開始不安， 她總覺得天使要離開她了， 到另一個女孩身旁。 於是有一天女孩趁著天使睡覺的時候， 把天使的翅膀藏了起來。 天使醒了之後生氣的說 「把我的翅膀還給我，為什麼要 這樣？ 我不能飛，不能出去，妳不愛我了」 「我沒有，我還是愛你的， 我沒有藏你的翅膀，真的，相信我好嗎？」 「你騙人，說謊，我不相信妳了， 我感覺得到，你不愛我了。」 當天使在女孩的櫃子裡找出翅膀後， 就頭也不回地飛離女孩和那愛的小窩。 女孩每天都很難過， 也很懷念那段曾經美好的生活， 女孩後悔了， 她心裡不斷的懺悔著： 「縱使我是多麼的愛你， 也不可以剝奪你自由飛翔的權利， 是嗎？ 愛一個人，也要給他足夠的空間， 讓彼此有喘息的空間。 這就是你要給我的領悟嗎？ 我現在都懂了，你回來好不好，回來我身邊」 忽然間天使出現了， 並溫柔地對她說 「我回來了，親愛的 女孩。」 「你不是離開了，你不是不愛我了？」 天使微微的笑著說： 「我可以感覺得到，妳還是愛我的， 不是嗎？只要你還愛著我， 我也會一直愛妳的， 直到妳又 不再愛我
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其實很多人， 就會像那個女孩一般， 用愛當作藉口， 約束著對方， 這樣的愛情不旦苦了自己， 也苦了對方， 這樣感到快樂嗎？ 愛情裡會有許許多多的習慣， 習慣他的味道， 習慣他的陪伴， 習慣他的關心， 就像坐電車會習慣坐在相同的位子一樣。 但是也會有變相的習慣， 就像你只是習慣有他的陪伴， 卻已經沒有所謂的愛了。 不妨想想看， 你和他之間除了這些習慣， 還有沒有其他的成份存在， 這段感情會不會再有進展， 能不能隨著時間的增長而更加成熟？ 如果是肯定的那就好好的珍惜這段情感 如果是否定的， 那就該好好考慮。
hmm..few days nv update le..coz lazy 2 update..hehe..& actualli nothin much oso..
tues, mi&3rd jie went Heart Centre w. my daddy loh..tis time go is 2 c doc..regardin d test report..den d doc c d report liao..den he sae if my daddy wanna go 4 another test 2 test whether his heart muscle still active anot loh..coz his heart blood vessel gt blockage..den mayb is more than 1..den if d heart muscle still active, den mayb can juz by medication..if inactive, den is a muz 2 go 4 opt..haiz..den my 3rd jie asked d doc whether he can go 4 oversea trip anot..den d doc sae he cant..scare he will faint..den d doc even sae his eyes cannot go 4 opt liao..even wrote a letter 4 d eye doc..
den fri, again acc my daddy c doc..but tis time is go SGH 2 c his principal doc..d 1 who attended 2 him when he in hospital..den i go w. him 1st den my erjie came joined us later coz she took time-off frm work..den when we reached there, i went 2 help him registered 1st..den d nurse ask mi durin him go take his weight..den go liao..c..is self-service 1..den he measure..i c d weight i almost fainted...onli 47.3!!!...even lighter den mi..den next go do blood test..den wait awhile den his turn..do test liao..we went back 2 d plc we registered & wait 4 his turn 2 c doc..den when d no. on d board show a no. after us..mi& jiejie went 2 ask d nurse..den nurse sae if we do blood test..den will b an hr later..when we hear tt we almost fainted..den my erjie called my dajie 2 complaint..den my dajie told her..tt time when my daddy discharged, d nurse there got sae muz come an hr earlier..den mi&erjie sae her..y nv tell us earlier & blah blah blah..finally our turn liao, d blood test report still nt ready yet still nid another 15mins..den d doc c my daddy's heart test report..den advise him 2 go 4 a bypass ASAP..den ask when next appointment w. d heart doc. & such..den she advise beta settle d heart prob ASAP coz his heart prob since july she attend him till nw den if keep on drag den will b more dangerous..den she sae she will make d next appointment 6 mths later..so by den he settled his heart, he will go back c her 4 his kidneys..jus in case, d medications 4 heart might affect his kidneys..den sae finished she sent us out again sae 15mins later den ask us go in again 4 d blood test..finally d test report comes liao..den go in..she shown us d report..wah lau..total 6-7 tests onli 1 can make it..d rest too high..so d doc advise my daddy 2 go 4 another blood test b4 he c his heart doc next appointment..haiz..so troublesome!!..den nw muz wait 4 9 sept den he goes 4 his heart test..after c-in doc, mi&daddy came hm..
den ard 4+ almost 5pm, i decided 2 slp awhile b4 gg dinner coz headache..mayb nt enuff slp..den go slp..but ar..end up slp less than 40mins..1st nana msg mi den after awhile call mi & talk talk awhile..den ar..later can some1(which i cant rem who) msg again..den nvm..finally can slp..but ar..ard 5.40..my 3rd jie called tell mi her fren gt lobang 4 2 temp admins..ask mi interested anot..& if ani fren wanna work..den i told her tonite den tok coz i wanna slp..but put down liao..i cant slp animore..so i msg nana told her abt d job..she reply..ok loh..if i work she work coz got ppl pei..after tt, i wake up go prepare 4 d dinner w. tt 'jiejie'...
ard 7 we had dinner, haiz..i sit down there realli like a moving stone..onli move 2 take food..dint even open my mouth much 4 toking..so boring..den 9+, i reached hm..den msg von..den tis ger..haiz..dun take hp 4 wat!!!..8 out of 10 times, always nv able 2 hear/sense hp rings one sia..until 1 hr plus later den reply mi..haiz..even i msg nana oso nana reply mi faster..next time hp company muz come up w. hp tt rings loud loud or vibrate strong..den suitable 4 von..hehe..den later in d @nite..des replied mi..i'm happy 4 her..too bad i cant b there..
den 2day, met some gers 4 a chat loh..nothing much..but still happy..coz @least i'm nt @hm..hehe..den heard some things frm them which i find it so freaky..hehe..hope nobody will do such things 2 mi..hehe...
*..hmm..hope can get in 2 d job my jie's fren intro mi..den i can earn some $$..no nid @hm rot..*
HAIZ..so sian..coz on sun nite..my erjie call hm sae tt "jiejie" who brought us ard hongkong droppin by sg 4 a nite tis fri juz 2 visit her parents-in-law & my parents..so my erjie&erjie-fu arranged a dinner 4 them 2 mit..den ar..my parents sae mi&3rd jie muz go..as a way of appreciation tt she brought us ard in hk & oso manners..but so sian..i dun wanna go..thou i noe tt "jiejie" realli treated us v. gd when we in hk..i wanna go 4 another event!!..
den i quite fed up w. my parents tis morning..coz no matter how i persuade they die die oso 1 mi go..ask mi go i go liao oso sit there diam diam 1 leh..like a rock sit there nia..haiz but bo bian..in d end..i still muz go..haiz..gg 2 b a boring fri 4 mi liao..bcoz of tis sudden dinner, i cant go 4 d other dinner + event liao..(so sry!!..i dint manage 2 keep my promise)..
haiz..i woke up 8+ tis mornin & started my persuading till noon time den i gave up..if i dun, i'll end up quarrellin w. them..den after take my lunch, ard 3+ i went 2 slp till 7+..wah kao..bth..i wake up..i gt sore throat sia..actually b4 i slp, abit pain liao..but who noes wake up..den kao..so pain..make mi even more no mood..bth..argh..
*..wat a day..nothing gg smoothly for mi 2day..den tml still muz go NHC (National Heart Centre) w. my daddy & 3rd jie...haiz muz wake up early again..argh..hasnt been slpin well, slpin rite tis few days..my body clock simply go crazy liao..aniway..juz hope my throat feels beta tml mornin..*
想要爱你 ~ 言承旭
曲：陈忠义 词：徐若瑄 编：
你的头发垂在耳边 风轻轻吹遮住了眼
温柔的眼神有些疲倦但很美
我的祝线在你的脸 你太认真没有发现
闪烁的眼神 此刻你在想着谁
不舍看见你为爱憔悴 为爱掉眼泪
只能给你安慰 默默守在身边
想要疼你每天每天 想要爱你永远永远
在有生之年 何时你才会发现
想要抱你每天每天 想要爱你永远永远
你所有心愿 我都会奋不顾身 去完成
你的头发垂在耳边 风轻轻吹遮住了眼
温柔的眼神有些疲倦但很美
我的祝线在你的脸 你太认真没有发现
闪烁的眼神 此刻你在想着谁
不舍看见你为爱憔悴 为爱掉眼泪
只能给你安慰 默默守在身边
想要疼你每天每天 想要爱你永远永远
在有生之年 何时你才会发现
想要抱你每天每天 想要爱你永远永远
你所有心愿 我都会奋不顾身 去完成
想要疼你每天每天 想要爱你永远永远
拥着你入睡 睡着了帮你盖被
想要抱你每天每天 想要爱你永远永远
你所有心愿 我都会奋不顾身 去完成
aiyo..again stepped my foot into d land of TTSH (Tan Tock Seng Hospital)..d last time was 4 my fyp proj. den 2day is bcoz of daddy..
2day acc daddy goes ttsh 4 his eyes appointment..reached there 10am..den started waitn 4 his turn 2 do a test..waited almost 30mins den his turn..den waited another 20mins 4 him 2 finish tt test..den he went 4 a optical readin test (d normal optical test when we do our spec)..den spent a v. long time waitin 4 his turn 2 c d doc..den his turn liao..doc juz c his eyes..den sent him out & wait again..coz he nid 2 put eye drops & oso wait 4 his scan 2 come..den waited 4 another 30mins i tink den his turn again 2 c doc..den nw best is diff. doc as d 1 juz b4 wor..den nvm..tis time is a lady doc..she gave mi a feelin tt she's a new doc..coz there's 1 main doc there..den when d main doc. came 2 our rm..thru they both's conversation..i can sense d lady doc. is new doc..after a long examine, den she sae my daddy nid a opt. 2 remove sth..i oso dunnoe wat d thing call..dint manage 2 catch wat she's sayin..den nvm..she sent us out 2 wait again..den another 10mins she came out..den ask us go 2 rms..rm 3 & rm 25..we went 3..den d doc there do a test 4 daddy..den after she done w. daddy's report, we went rm 25 &wait again..by den was oledi 1pm liao...den d doc there sae..whoeva haven eat..beta go eat 1st..coz it might take some times wor..so i asked daddy go makan 1st lah..den he sae ok loh..coz @1st he wanna wait till come back our estate here den go makan..after makan went back wait 4 another 15mins our turn liao..FINALLY..last rm 2 go..den ar d doc measure daddy's blood pressure..aiyo..so damn high sia..202/110..d doc c liao..sae she dun dare give him d date 4 opt..coz scare by den he nv take med den blood pressure still so high..den cannot opt 1 loh..if opt liao, so faint..so d doc ask daddy go get his blood pressure med 1st den after tt few days later when blood pressure stable/lower..den go back take d date ..haiz..so troublesome..after tt we went 2 pay liao..den go down take his med, lucky no nid wait too long ard 15mins onli..finally we left tt plc ard..2+..den reached hm 3...
*..so sian..spend so much time sittin/waiting..haiz..i was quite slpy..den best i was forwardin msg 2 ppl..den a fren replied sae..my slping habit v. special..coz he sae i sent him a gd nite msg..lolx..i tink too tired liao lah..*
den reached hm liao..online saw recruit tan (Bj)..den he msg mi..1st question i ask..how come he still @hm??...den he sae he juz discharged frm TTSH tis morning...coz he was hospitalised last nite coz he fever 40 degree den still gt breathin difficulty..sound so serious..den still tell mi evenin time gg book in again den tml mornin still 7+3 fieldcamp (dunnoe wat's tt)..*hope he get well soon sia, he has been in & out of hospital v. often tis yr ar..
after chatting awhile onli, i play game halfway i fall aslp in front of pc again den lucky i gt wake up den go bed & slp..den 7 i woke up..i saw my daddy, he, himself trying 2 dismantle d old dinnin table..den i so shock loh..coz i scare he cut himself..he gt diabeties..cannot cut himself one leh..den ask him stop he dun wan..den bo bian i call my jie jies..den my jie jie all wan mi stop him..but..my stubborn daddy wont listen 1 lah..den end up i joined him dismantle d table..den i still do d cleanin up job sia..bth..
den juz nw tokin 2 shan online, she told mi she had a tok w. tt guy..den she sae he told her i avoidin him on d grad ceremony..den i admit i did try nt 2 tok 2 him..move away frm him..givin fake smile??..coz d sight of him reminds mi of unhappy stuffs..& oso i gt nothing 2 tok 2 him abt..i cant possibly so da fang ask him how his love life ba??..hmm i can onli ask how his love life when i can even nt think of those unhappy stuffs..den oso found out sth..den i'm so glad tt i oledi let go d feeling i used 2 hv 4 him..& shan sae she's happy tt i can 4get him..but i dint 4get him..if i 4get him, he wont b my fren..he'll b a stranger 2 mi..i juz managed 2 let go d feelings i had 4 him..i juz nid time 2 try nt 2 avoid him..nid time 2 4get those unhappy stuffs..but i wont purposely force myself 2 4get..coz d more i force myself, d more i cant..so i always tell myself let time do d healin&4getin..& nw no more healing is needed 4 mi..juz 4gettin of those things..
*..haiz..shld i go b a child care teacher & 4get abt findin job sia??..lol..job searchin is so SIAN AR..*
similar 2 1 of d pics in part I..juz diff. camera..& w. 2 monkeys jumpin behind us..
↑↑ Von_Nana_Shan_Rach_Lihui -- there's 2 monkeys behind us.. (shan's cam)